170 words by a whitespace count. This teaching example has an AI-estimated band, not an official examiner score. Read the commentary, then attempt the question yourself.
“The pie charts show the global market share of mobile operating systems in 2015 and 2023.”Model answer
170 wordsP1The two pie charts compare global mobile operating system market share in 2015 and 2023.
P2Overall, the most striking change was that iOS nearly doubled its share over the period while Android's proportion declined, while the 'other' category almost disappeared entirely by 2023.
P3In 2015, Android dominated the market with a commanding 80% share, while iOS accounted for 16% and other operating systems made up the remaining 4%. By 2023, Android's share had fallen by 10 percentage points to 70%, though it remained by far the largest platform. iOS, by contrast, rose from 16% to 29%, a gain of 13 percentage points that brought it to just under a third of the global market.
P4The 'other' category also fell sharply, shrinking from 4% in 2015 to just 1% in 2023, suggesting that the market had consolidated almost entirely around the two dominant platforms. Together, Android and iOS accounted for 96% of the market in 2015 and 99% in 2023, showing that these two platforms dominated the market in both years.
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Effective combined figure (96% to 99%) to illustrate the duopoly narrative.
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Could quantify the 'other' category's fall as a proportional decline (down 75%) to add analytical weight alongside the percentage-point figure.